7 miles

Yesterday was quite the busy day for us. I feel like I'm saying that all the time lately. After work we headed up to Hopkins to visit our nephew who had his brain surgery on Monday. He looks amazing and is progressing wonderfully. He's definitely not his normal self, as he's in pain and really sleepy, but overall everyone is very pleased.

I had to skip the gym in order to make it to the hospital on time for our visiting slot. So we decided afterwards we'd go for a long bike ride to get our exercise in. We live close to a beautiful park that's right on the Chesapeake Bay. We biked there and rode around the whole park. We rode on a giant fishing pier, stopped at the beach, saw tons of deer, and tackled hill after hill. Definitely a fulfilling ride. All in all it was 7 miles and boy did I feel it ;)

Brain Surgery and stress

What a stressful weekend. It was nice in that it was Father's Day and my Dad is certainly someone to celebrate. I had a nice time with him on his day. Otherwise it was such a busy non stop weekend that by Sunday night my body was physically exhausted at every level. I even started to get chills, that's my sign of enough is enough.

I helped my parents this weekend by cleaning and preparing their house for a cookout. As happy as I was to help, it was a lot of work and it consumed most of the weekend. Top that with lack of sleep (big time) and worrying about my nephew's upcoming brain surgery and that about sums up the weekend. Tiring.

On a happy and more positive note my nephew had brain surgery today for repair of Chiari Malformation. He did wonderfully and is making great progress just hours post-op. That's a huge weight off for everyone. Hopefully he keeps up his resiliance and will be home in a few days.

Today I went back to the gym for a good run. They were closed a few days last week for renovations but the doors were open today! The place looks great, and they have a ton of brand new cardio equipment. I broke in a brand new treamill with a 2.2 mile run! I have to say it felt pretty good to run off some stress ;)

Attacked by a 7 year old ;)

Today we spent the day with Scott's family doing our Christmas together. It was a wonderful day all around. I think for me though, besides the obvious Christmas feel in the air was my niece's reaction to her present.

We have her a "Moxie Girl" playset. I was sitting on the floor watching all the kids open there presents chit chatting when suddenly I heard a shriek and soon after landed on my back. That's right, my 7 year old niece LOVED her present that much that she tackled me to the floor in hugs and "thank you's." I have NEVER had a better reaction. And bonus, it was caught on video ;)

Today was a good day!

Thanks Day 24 (Thanksgiving Eve)

The Wednesday before Thanksgiving we have our dinner with my Mom's side of the family. Last night was our dinner at our home. I got up early to run a few errands, pick up my Mom, and start cooking. We spent all day in my kitchen preparing every last drop of food. It was great! One of my absolute favorite things to do is to cook!

Overall we ended up having 16 people at the dinner table. Those that were there truly made it a wonderful Thanksgiving. To me, there is nothing like having your family sit around a HUGE table, laughing, talking, telling stories, and just being thankful for being together. It was perfect. Oh and the smells of the Thanksgiving food lingering in the house all day long, yum!

As part of our blessing last night I wanted to recognize my Mother. We had a very rough year with her, and her health. I honestly didn't even know if we'd be where we are right now. She's come a long way in the last 8 months and I couldn't be happier with her progress. I finally have my Mother back. For this, and our Thanksgiving Eve dinner, I am so very thankful.

Thanks Day 21 (Get-Togethers)

Today we hosted our annual football party. Originally I had it scheduled for last month, then somehow my brain malfunctioned when I realized that I'd planned the party for the same day Scott was in a wedding! Doh! Luckily it was no biggie and easy to reschedule. Around this time of year schedules start to fill up, but we were able to fit it in and everyone had a great time!

Today my Ravens played Carolina, and I'm sure you could hear us screaming and cheering across the country! WOO HOO!!! Throwing parties, or small get togethers is one of my favorite things to do. I love love love to entertain! Making food, drinks, and preparing to have a house full of people is just awesome to me!

So we made tons of food, had great drinks, wonderful family and friends, and a wonderful day. Of course the day was even better since my Ravens won ;) And for all of these things, I am VERY thankful.

From new shoes to phantom pains...

I was ecstatic today to see the package laying on my front step this evening. Ahhh, my new running shoes have arrived. I can't wait to break them in tomorrow! This week started week 3 of my plan. I ran my 2 miles this afternoon and felt great afterwards!! Looking forward to tomorrow with the new shoes to break in...

In other health stuff, I've been having phantom gallbladder pains, uncool. I'm not sure what it's about, but I'm watching it and hoping it goes away on it's own. Otherwise Hopkins will know on Thursday. I'm wondering if I have a gallstone, or sludge, or a blocked bile duct? I had my gallbladder out in 2003 so I haven't felt this pain for a while.

We had a great night tonight eating crabs and hanging out on the water with family that is up visiting from Florida. We rarely get to see them, so it was wonderful :)

Another 1.5 miler and the faces of Prednisone

Day 2 of the new running plan is officially in the books. Well recorded in the blog anyway. It went well, and I'm beyond grateful to say that I could have run further and it wouldn't have phased me. I limited myself to a 3 minute warm up walk, followed by a 1.5 mile run with the treadmill set at 4.4 mph. All in all a walk of 3 mintues+ a run of 21 minutes= a very happy and accomplished feeling me :)

On a side note, the Prednisone has me all over the place no matter how hard I try to hide it. I broke down at work yesterday morning, luckily with my closest co-worker so no huge deal, but still. Sometimes on the big "P" I'm just fine, no issues at all, well of course there is always the ravenous bottomless pit hunger. Honestly, I'm ok with that because this girl loves to eat!

It's just hard when you already have so many emotions and things going on in your mind. I have a lot of "firsts" coming up this week and next, so I'm slightly anxious. Add Prednisone to the mix and you have yourself a not-so-great combination of your eyes leaking like a faucet.

I just got back from changing my Mom's dressings on her legs and as I went to leave I just broke down. Seeing her in a hospital bed at home (granted we are making huge progress) hurts my heart a little bit. Mr. Prednisone is only enhancing these emotions.

Well, that's it for today...

Not a fan of Confrontation

I've got a lot on my mind this last week, and actually to say a lot is putting it mildly. Without getting into mega details, I've had to put this quote to use this week..... "Love someone enough to let them hate you." I don't like it, and I'm not happy about it, but I just hope that one day they will realize that I was only trying to help because I love them so much. It's not easy, and I want to pick up the phone so badly, but I can't. I don't like this confrontation thing, and this isn't me. All I can do is hope for the best....

It's been a pretty crazy week as far as busy goes. Tonight is the first night all week where I didn't have something scheduled. Yesterday was a 14 hour work day. Now I remember why I don't miss my days of 12 hour shifts anymore. However I am officially recertified in ACLS. I always hope I don't have to use it, but better safe :)

Is it the weekend yet?

My Nieces and Nephews

Busted for jumping on my bed! Can you tell how much they cared? ;)

Too much sugar in these cookies!

Proud of his Gingerbread house

We had everyone in Scott's family over for our annual "Cookie Night" cookie exchange. As always we had a great time. We ate pizza, listened to Christmas music, baked cookies, made Gingerbread houses, and had Eggnog (the adults anyway). Overall we are up to our eye balls in cookies and loved having everyone over our house.

I think the highlight for me is spending time with my nieces and nephews. For one, they are getting so big so fast, and two, you just never know what they are going to say or do next :) Since we don't have any kids (yet) Scott and I get to be "the cool ones." We let them be crazy, silly, have fun, tell their crazy stories, and just eat up every minute of it. Some of my favorite things last night with them were:

*This was also the first year that my oldest niece brought a boyfriend to our house. Gah! I feel old! However her and her boyfriend played a joke (on Scott) by hanging my "Edward Cullen" poster over our bed. Bwah ha ha!!

*My 7 year old niece was telling me how her "BFF" in school is a REAL elf who works for Santa, "For real Aunt Jess!" ;)

*My 10 year old niece knows more about how to use my Blackberry than I do. (uncool, haha).

*My youngest nephew and I were pretend talking on cellphones and he was pretending I was one of his bestest cool friends from school. He was also upset because he wanted to bring over his pet lizard for Aunt Jess to see.

*Also I should get mega cool points for letting these rugrats jump on my bed, since they aren't aloud to do it at home.....ever.

Ahh I love them :)

Thanksgiving #2

Tonight I am hosting my Mom's side of the family for Thanksgiving. We've always done it on Wednesday night, but this is my first year having it at my house. I took off work today, which is nice in itself. Today the day will be spent cooking, hanging out with Mom, and getting ready for about 20 people around 7pm.

Yesterday was a sad day. Our friend Courtney with CF passed away. As sad as I am and was yesterday when I found out, I was relieved when I read her sisters blog on how it happened. Speechless. If you have a chance, you should read this amazing story. Just goes to show you that we have Angels around us all the time. I think because I was already an emotional wreck yesterday the whole baby thing hit me again. I've been doing so well too, and bam it all just fell on me. I had 2 vivid dreams this week that I was pregnant, or a Mom already. It's always boys that I have too. Just makes me realize how ready I am, and wish for it to happen again for us, but terrified of another miscarriage.

I'm also waiting on a call back from Hopkins. The Prednisone is helping, I stopped the HTS, and have been running a mile everyday. They may call in Antibiotics to have on hold since it's a long weekend, but don't think it's an infection. That's good news. :)

Thanksgiving #1 of 3

Is it just me or is it hard to believe that Thanksgiving is already here!? Wow. We spent our first Thanksgiving today at Scott's parents house with everyone. It was a nice time, good food, and always nice to be around family :) I'm not sure what the highlight of the day was for me....1. My nephew sitting with me and out of his bag of gummy bears he picked out my favorites ones and gave them to me. Too Cute for words. Or.....#2, My niece gave me a poster of Robert Pattinson aka Edward Cullen! Woo Hoo!!! Wonder if Scott will mind If I plaster that bad boy in our bedroom ;)

I also did my part of Ronnie's challenge and ran for 24 minutes today. It was a killer run, and I'm so glad I did it! I set the resistance up, so on the Eliptical it was only a mile, but whoa mamma it was a good run!

My Nephew and I :)

Record Breaking

We've had an insanely chaotic few weeks, both sad and celebratory. We buried Scotts grandfather yesterday, sad, but I got the PICC pulled, happy :)

Went to Hopkins on Thursday and blew record breaking PFT's :) 70% which I haven't seen In a long time. SO exciting! I'm glad I showed pneumonia who's boss ;) I can't explain how grateful I am that the IV's did their job and I feel so much better!

Well I'm on my way to NYC today with some of my friends to do some early Christmas shopping. Hope everyone has a great weekend. Its great to be back to being me again :)

Sad News

Scott's Grandfather passed away last night :( So things are a little insane around here right now for sure. I'm taking a few day mini break but will be back ASAP. I go to Hopkins on Thursday to follow up and do PFT's....the PICC may come out then too, we shall see :)

Have a great week everyone! Hope everyone had a great Halloween!

First Day Back

Well today I decided to give it a whirl and go back to work. Exactly one week ago today is when I was at work, and knew I had pnuemonia and was admitted. It was great to stay home and rest, especially loved being home with the dogs. However, I was beginning to go a little crazy and was happy to get back to work today.

Things went really well overall. The staff, doctors, etc. were all so awesome and happy to see me. I definitely am lucky to say that I truly love my job. I only had a handful of patients to take care of today, so it was a nice way to gently get back into my groove. I was able to all the IV's at work with no problems, ahh what a nice day.

So tonight my Mom offered to come over after work and make me dinner. Woo Hoo! Nothing like mom's cooking. However my Dad called and said he got some fresh Maryland Crabs Steamed! So now they are bringing over steamed crabs for dinner instead. Totally made my day!! :)

Well overall I'd say it feels great to be almost back to my normal. Tomorrow is Halloween at work, including dressing up and making food. Yay!

Did I mention that I blew out on my PFT monitor today and got a 1.99!!!??? That's right!! Couldn't be happier :D

Dear Pop,

My Pop and I at my wedding in 2004....A tribute to my Pop

Today would have been your 76th birthday. You popped into my head first thing this morning, much as you do every single day. To say I miss you is an understatement. I don't even think it's possible to put into words how much of a hole there is in my heart now that you aren't here. You were by far the best Grandfather on this earth to me, and for that I'll always be grateful. I wish so badly that you were here today for me to call you and wish you a happy birthday. I'd sing to you on the phone (even though it sounds awful) you'd laugh, and we both know you'd sing to me on my birthday. I know that you are here with me, I don't even need to explain it, I just know it. I pray to you every night that you watch over all of us in the family and keep us safe and healthy. You do that for us and again, I thank you for that. Every time I cracked open a yummy Maryland crab this summer guess who I thought of? :) My Pop, since crabs were/are our favorite!!!! Every time I hear the song "Bad Bad Leroy Brown" your favorite song ever I laugh and cry at the same time. Pop, I hope you had a nice birthday today. I'm sad that Pancreatic Cancer took you away from us so soon, you mean the world to me. XO

Love, Your Jess

Camping

We had lots of fun camping. It was great to escape the "real world" for 2 days and just hang out in the wilderness. We hung out all weekend with family and just relaxed. Friday night we got there around 5:30 since trafffic was awful as usual. Once we set up our pop-up we joined everyone for dinner. I was going to run out and grab something quick since we got there later than we'd hoped, but to our surprise Scott's family had a TON of left overs including steaks, corn on the cob, salads, bread etc. It was delicious! That night we did the usual hanging out at the campfire and just chatting. It was so relaxing. I just love the smell of a campfire and hearing all the creatures at night in the trees.

Saturday was a cool day temperature wise, honestly this whole weekend felt like Fall to me. I loved it! It stormed a ton on Saturday and boy let me say they were some good thunderstorms too. I welcomed the rain. Honestly it gave me time to relax in the darkness of the storms, reading "Eclipse" and enjoying a glass of wine. To me it was perfect. Saturday night once the rain let up we managed to get outside with everyone and cook dinner on the grill. Again a delicious variety of steaks, BBQ chicken, Mac N Cheese, potatoes, yum yum yum! And dessert for me was of course roasted marshmallows. Glad I enjoyed them while I did because they were used later in the night in a marshmallow throwing war ;)

All in all it was a great weekend. My foot was really bothering me this weekend though. To my surprise it's better today. Hmm, weird. I figured I'd give it until tomorrow and if it's still swollen and sore then I'll go to the Doctors to have it checked out. Overall we had a great camping trip. It was awesome to hang out with my nieces and nephews all weekend too. The campground we were at rents golfcarts so of course they were asking me non-stop to take them on rides. I absolutely loved it too. Of course what my niece and her friends really wanted to go on the rides for, was to look for cute boys! Ahh to be 14 again :)

On a less fun note. One of my sister-in-laws friends asked me at the campfire "Jess when are you going to have a baby!?" I tried as hard as I could to hold it together and not get upset: Mission Failed. I broke down having to deal with talking about the miscarriage yet again. So much for avoiding that topic this weekend. Oh well, moving on and thinking positively...And on the baby topic, we actually had the loudest baby ever staying behind us. Funny overall because the baby was SO LOUD laughing and cackling, but it woke me up both mornings so super early. But how could I be mad at that?

Here's a picutre of Hooper and Me yesterday...Hope everyone had a great weekend too!

Busy weekend

Wow the weekend completely flew by! I can't believe that I work in about 9 hours, whoa.

Friday night we went to have dinner with friends and go see Transformers 2. For those of you who don't know Scott, he's the biggest Transformers fan on the planet. Transformers fill our house, and he has EVERY Transformer of Generation 1 ever made. So obviously it's part of my marital contract to partake in such Transformers events ;) The movie was "ok" I was kind of disappointed. I have to say the first one was better. But overall we had fun.

Saturday was a great day. I got up in the morning, went and got a large coffee, and spent the morning finishing the first book of the TWILIGHT series. OMG I am so hooked on these books already! Sooooo good! And like every female has told me to "enjoy falling in love with Edward"...oh I really am!!! It was a relaxing morning, followed by a trip to Target. I find myself there at least once a week. It's my favorite place to just pick up odds and ends type stuff. Later Saturday night we went to a crab feast which was awesome :) Steamed crabs and beer makes for a great night amongst friends.

Today was just as nice. I got up early and met up with Beth at Starbucks and then Kohls. I was on a mission to find my grandmother a birthday gift for her party today. What to procrastinate eh? Well I ended up getting her a great jewelry set of pearl earrings and a necklace and she really loved it. For her birthday I made her a purse-cake and it turned out reall cute! I was surprised how easy it actually was. I have to give Scott his credit, he actually baked the cake for me while I was out gift hunting and coffee drinking earlier. Thanks! :) So I assembled and did all the fancy stuff to it when I got home. Then it was off to Granny's birthday party this evening. All in all it was very nice with the exception of the usual, minimal family drama. It was great to see my cousins, baby Ally, and the extended family as always.

So now I sit here doing the neb/meds routine thinking about the week ahead. Hmm also realizing that I nothing done at home this weekend that needed to get done. Guess laundry will be Monday's after work project, oh yay. I had no time to workout this weekend too which wore on me a little bit. I didn't feel a difference of anything bad, but It just bugged me. So 2 days is no big deal, but means after work tomorrow, before tackling the mounds of laundry that exercise is first.

Hope everyone had a great weekend. I'm also beginning the next book in the series called "New Moon." I've never in my life been so excited to come home and read!!!! I loved the first book, and am hoping it just gets better and better. I can see my social life dwindling while I'm reading these books....ha ha.

Much on the Mind

Yesterday was kind of a tough day. Missed my Grandfather terribly yesterday (as everyday) so it was a blah kind of day for me. Of course I don't like to feel down and dumpy but it was just one of those days. We weren't able to see my Dad yesterday since Scott's back was hurting so much we didn't leave the house. We didn't see his Dad either since they are away. Oh well at least Scott got a Father's Day card from the dogs :P

There was actually a lot weighing on my mind yesterday. I don't know why exactly it all hit me yesterday but it did. I'm still worried about my friends daughter whom is still hospitalized for her seizures. They've tried different medications now and it's just made matters worse. If these next meds don't work, she'll have to undergo surgery. Breaks my heart since she's not even 2 yet, and my friend (her mother) is currently 7 months pregnant with their 3rd child. I just feel helpless for them. For some reason yet again the miscarriage hit me. No rhyme or reason it just does and I feel this emptiness inside. I'm also worried about another fellow CFer who's hospitalized right now not doing so well. I feel like it's been a rough month in our little CF world. Two of my friends are also in the hospital CF related and on IV's as of yesterday. I sure am sending out lots of prayers their way. I really am trying to stay postive, use the Secret, and continue to look at my vision board and know that things are going to work out. Just one of those days I suppose....

So despite the day being that of which it was I decided to turn that energy around and go for a kick butt bike ride! And that's just what I did. I ended up doing a total workout yesterday of 8 miles, woo hoo!!! Plus I lifted weights thanks to the awesome routines Ronnie has sent me. Thank You!!!! My meter numbers rocked afterwards which just made my day. Recently with all this inflammatory stuff going on I just didn't feel a difference, and now I finally am! :)

Today I continued with a tough workout as well. I go to Hopkins tomorrow for my CF checkup which always makes me a little tense to put it mildly. So I'm hoping that things go well! Today's workout consisted of a 25 minute Eliptical workout with a 5 minute cool down which was over a mile. It was a killer workout and It felt great! I then went for a bike ride of almost 2 miles after dinner. Overall I feel very good about these last 2 days and the mucho mileage ;)

On a random note my buffalo wing craving kick still continues, hence we ordered them for dinner again tonight. YUMMY! They are so discustingly good, bring on the calories! And thanks to my co-worker she's got me completely hooked on reading first Twilight book. I haven't read a book for leisure since college! Nursing school did me in as far as leisurely reading goes, so it's been at least 7 years. Well the cycle is broken because I can't put this darn book down! I loved the movie, and promised I'd give the book a try. So far so great!

Scott's back still hurts him pretty badly, but he's staying active. Too active actually....although I admire him wanting to keep moving I just don't want him to hurt himself any more than he has. I won't mention that he was outside cutting trees down earlier either, or that he hung all new blinds up in the house, or that he vacuumed.....no not me, no way ;) Oh did I mention he took the day off to "relax" :P

Well tomorrow is clinic day after work...I'll catch up tomorrow. I actually have lots of questions for this visit. I'll keep you posted.

Here's to turning off the brain for the night....

Day off

So I took the day off today and was able to sleep in until 9:20 am, woo hoo!!! Met up with Scott for lunch which was nice then headed to Easton to visit Granny. Unfortunately she's still in a "Rehab center" or nursing home, for recovery post knee replacement. Ugh I hate nursing homes! Even during nursing school and we did our clinical rotations there I dreaded it and was so sad :( Today was about the same... Walked in to the N.H. to a cute confused lady that was talking to me about a painting on the wall. Just breaks my heart to see this, then you walk around the corner to people moseying around in their wheelchairs while being disoriented. My grandmother luckily is of sound mind and is taken care of very well b/c she wouldn't have it anyother way. But please explain to me how when her roommate called for help the aide said "You're going to make me late to my meeting! I just changed you at 11am!" Grrrrr....I wanted to slap her! How in the hell do you get away with talking to someone like that. Would she like to lay in her own mess!!!??? I wanted to report her so badly, but didn't.

I went to my Granny's house for her to pick up her clothes, and do some things for her. Chatted with her neighbors who are so cute. Went back to the N.H. to hang out with her some more. This time the little senior citizens were having an Easter party and were making hats. Soo cute!! I headed home a little bit later. It's over an hour drive, but no worries I stopped at the new drive-thru Starbucks and got a mocha for the road. Plus I had the iPOD to rock out to while driving. It was such a scenic ride with all of the trees blooming, just lovely.

So now I'm home and can't turn my brain off from the sad patients I saw today. I have a bad habit of wanting to save everyone and know I can't. I wanted to help take care of all of them, make them feel important, and if nothing else just have a visitor. I need to understand that I can't save everyone, but I sure would like to.....

Cookie Day

We had our 3rd annual cookie day exchange today and it went very well, I'm just so tired! Scott's family came over here around 1130 ish and we baked cookies until about 15 minutes ago. We have so many awesome varieties of cookies too! I got up this morning and made our 3 batches from scratch....Sugar cookies, Peanut butter, and Ginger snaps. We also had white chocolate macadamia nut, chocolate chip, M & M cookies, peanut butter kiss cookies, and i'm probably forgetting some :)They went over very well and turned out amazing! All in all it went very well, now it's time to unwind, eat the mound of cookies we have, and call it a night.

Back to work tomorrow...man this 4 day holiday weekend went by too quickly!